✐ We are the champions...

So Sweden didn't win the Eurovision song contest (didn't think so either). But we won the World Cup in Ice Hockey. There was a big celebration for the players in Stockholm yesterday.

✐ Memories

I couldn't help but to think of you today. The first semi-final of the Eurovision song contest, that takes place in Sweden this year, because of Loreen (Euphoria) winning the contest last year.  I watched it alone. Happy that your country made it to the finals.

Also it's 5 years ago I had to get a passport so I could visit you. The past few years I've used it as an identity card, but it's expiring in June. So I have to apply for a new passport, visiting the same place as I did 5 years ago.Then I was so much in love, full of dreams and hope...
Now I'm going there just because of necessity, I need a  document to be able identify myself in the society I live in.

These songs are for, what used to be "us".

✐ Dreams are like movies

Something did happen after the latest hypnocompic dream I had. I sleep so much better now, I still dream a lot, but I have been able to detach myself from the dreams. Instead of being caught up in them, they have become "movies" that I watch every night. Sometimes I've even laughed in my sleep, some of the "dreams" are funny.

I think I made a semi-conscious decision to not pay so much attention to my dreams. I realized they were just chatter from my mind, and the mind is tricky, bringing up all my past traumas during my sleep. My "witness" woke up and started to laugh, saying; "You fool, the past is the past, there is only here and now, how could you forget"

I know where this focus on my dreams comes from, psychotherapy. I started with it when I was 18 for 2 years, then I quit for a  year or two until I found a new psychotherapist and I went through 4 years of psychodynamic psychotherapy. A large part of that therapy was dream analysis, so I guess that so many years of conditioning and at a young age, really had an impact on me. I mean, altogether 6 years of psychotherapy, when I was 26 years old...

Yeah, I had a traumatic childhood too... (go figure)